Mother’s Day and the Carnation Tradition

It’s hard to believe, but Mother’s Day is less than three weeks away!

In Japan, the traditional gift for this day is the carnation. The flower symbolizes a mother’s pure love, affection, and strength. The custom is said to have been influenced by the early 20th-century Western Mother’s Day movement, but in Japan, the red carnation specifically came to represent gratitude and the deep bond between mother and child.

When I was in elementary school, our school practically forced every family to buy a fake carnation brooch that came with a ribbon saying, “Thank you, Mom.” I still remember the excitement I felt each year, waiting to give that little brooch to my mother, along with a handwritten card—just to see her smile.

By the time I reached middle school and started receiving a small allowance, I used it to buy a single real carnation for her. It was all I could afford, but it never failed to make her happy.

Now, many years later, I still send carnations for Mother’s Day—not a plastic brooch or a single flower, but a beautiful bouquet, already arranged in a basket or pot so she doesn’t have to do anything except place it wherever she likes. I usually pair it with a bottle of champagne—sometimes from the brand Mumm, because it sounds like “Mom,” and sometimes a rosé, because she loves the color pink.

But this year, I’m pausing.

Lately, things have changed. My mother, who used to be so easy to please and grateful for every little thing, has begun to say no. She's developed some early dementia and started refusing gifts with reasons like, “I don’t like the color,” or “It doesn’t feel good,” or even, “It’s a waste of money.”

To be honest, it hurts when something I chose with care is rejected and returned. But I’ve come to accept that this is just another stage of life. She doesn’t have to like what I pick. What matters is that I keep trying to find something that does make her happy.

In the end, it’s the heart of the receiver that defines a gift—not the giver. And maybe that’s the most important lesson of all.

What about you?

Do you have a Mother’s Day tradition that’s close to your heart? Or a gift idea that has brought real joy to someone you love? I’d love to hear your story—drop it in the comments or share it with someone who might need a little inspiration this year.